Monday, March 30, 2009

Catfish Grablin' Girls!!!!


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Somehow the Dimwit doubts that the Hotwit gets involved in this little past time... just guessin'...

Monday Morning Musings...

Good morning to all who made it through another weekend... for those of you still hungover this glorious Monday morning, well the Dimwit wishes you the best for getting through the day.

Ok, enough of shooting sunshine up your... well, nevermind... yes, as you can tell The Dimwit has sold out to the corporate world, there are now ads on the blog. However he hopes that he has placed them in such a way that they don't limit your ability to enjoy the bloggage.

This weekend was nice. The Hotwit and the Dimwit went to see Les Miserables at the Hobby Center in downtown Houston. Bravo! Great show, The Dimwit has seen in many times and enjoyed it once again.

Saturday morning we went to the Bayou City Art Festival and saw some pretty awesome art. We really liked that guy's stuff. Very cool. Saturday afternoon we headed out to Armand Bayou Nature Center for some photography and mischief. Apparently the back trails were closed, but we went walking around there anyway and were rewarded with a great view.

Sunday was just totaly bum-age. Sat around the apartment as The Dimwit completed Defensive Driving and the Hotwit cleaned the apartment. The only thing missing was a beer but he figured that drinking a beer while doing Defensive Driving probably wouldn't be a great idea...

Have a good Monday and stuff!

Thursday, March 26, 2009

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG



OMG!!!!! Cannot wait... LOOKS AWESOME!!!! Yes, two blogs... one day... gotta love it!!!

Thursday... why aren't you Friday?????

Another Thursday of servitude...

Oh yea, you thought the Dimwit wasn't coming back this week, but he retains the right to lie about his future blogging or lack thereof. Call it "Creative License"... or something like that...

In the flood of response to his request for nicknames for the girlfriend (i.e. one comment from Cortico...) a suitable name has been established: Hotwit. The Dimwit is glad to report that this was agreed upon with absolutely no violence whatsoever. It was a much welcomed change of pace...

Although, in respect to fairness of reporting, the Dimwit must relay the following approximate exchange, which occured at aabout 2:30am yesterday morning...

Dimwit: (pulling and adjusting his pillow... but his head is still on it, so thus it never moves, hand loses grip and whacks the Hotwit directly in the face, whilst sleeping)... oops...
Hotwit: (groggy) It's ok... zzzz.....
Dimwit: *snicker*.... zzzz....

The Dimwit does not condone domestic (or non-domestic) violence of any kind... but in light of the string of events, it was pretty funny that he got away with a smack in the face with nothing more than a "It's ok..."

The Dimwit is convinced that the Hotwit is definitely plotting her revenge... and he doesn't realy blame her...

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

He's still alive... calm your fears...

Judging by the massive amounts of emails (i.e. NONE) wondering what happened to the Dimwit... he decided it would be best (i.e. a good 5 minute break from work) to get on the old blog and let all you people know that he is perfectly well and fine. He has been slammed with a big project or two at work and thus needs to concentrate on what he's actually getting paid for... however, if any of you readers want to pay him to blog on a daily basis at the equivalent pay scale of his current employers, well by all means, let him know and he will make a quick career change!!!!

Ok, so the Dimwit and the girlfriend were discussing something the other day, and Bob Marley came up... the following is the actual conversation:

Dimwit: He shot the sherrif!
Girlfriend: Yea he did!
Dimwit: But... you know... he didn't shoot the deputy...
Girlfriend: Actually, he did... I know it...
Dimwit: (confused) Huh?
Girlfriend: Oh yea, he shot the deputy too, but the deputy was his friend so he didn't want to say anything.
Dimwit: Oh really?
Girlfriend: Yep, that's what happened... (nom-nom-nom on a french fry)...
Dimwit: You do realize that we are actually having this conversation right?
Girlfriend: (nom-nom-nom)
Dimwit: That's why I love you. And I'm totally blogging about this... (nom-nom-nom)...
Girlfriend: Whatever, you never blog anymore...

There you go peeps... have a great rest of the week... the Dimwit will probably not be back for at least a week or so... enjoy... And by the way, if any of you have a suggestion for a nickname for the girlfriend, post a suggestion... because if it comes from you, he's less likely to get hurt for it... ish...

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Tuesday... St. Patrick's Day...

Sorry everyone, but the Dimwit has been SLAMMED with work... if you want to come do it for him, by all means...

There isn't much to say, as he doesn't have much time to type... hopefully soon there will be further bloggage with more than just his apologies...

For those who aren't wearing green... *PINCH*... for those who are you should enjoy The Dimwit, Jeanne and Kevin on their quest...

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

***** BONUS BLOG *****

IF YOU HAVE A WEAK STOMACH - DO NOT WATCH THIS VIDEO

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For those of you with a strong stomach... this is LMAO funny!!!! hahahaha...

An unhinged, angry Dimwit is not a fun Dimwit...

The Dimwit just thought he'd throw everyone off with the title of the post. In fact, he couldn't be happier... at least he is until some idiot in a BMW cuts him off on the freeway. Oh yes, he forgot that he failed to blog about this the other day... ah, yes, the refreshing feeling of napalm/ire welling up in the bloodstream... here we go...

Why is it that people who drive BMW's, Lexus's, Astin Martins and Jaguars think that because they paid 5-10 times more than the Dimwit for their car that this somehow entitles them to be absolute JERKS on the freeway??? The Dimwit is sorry, but just because you're a rich, pompous jerk this does not mean that you have the right to forcefully merge yourself into the Exit lane of 59 South during rush hour because you didn't want to wait in line like all of us other simpletons driving Mitsubishi's, Honda's and Buick's. All the while yapping on your Blackberry, giving other drivers the finger and honking as if whatever you're doing is SO much more important than everyone else's tasks. You also should not complain or cry to the police when one of the aforementioned Mitsubishi drivers follows you to your retail destination and artistically crafts a message into your side panel with a key...

The Dimwit does not condone such behavior. Nor does he judge those who have done it. (You know, the whole glass house/throwing bricks thing.)

*The Dimwit steps down from the soap box... takes a few deep breathes... smashes soap box in a fit of rage... walks away...*

So no linkage today... sorry, it is what it is people... you were warned not to get your expectations too high... you have this highly entertaining story and the Dimwit got his blood pressure up...

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Another day... another dollar...

So the Dimwit finally got with the 21st century and bought an iPod Touch. He's addicted. He's listening to Bill Simmons and Adam Carolla podcasts, buying music on iTunes and being THAT guy who walks around with ear buds in all day. His greatest fear has been realized... geez, he's gotta stop being that guy...

The Dimwit can't read a damned thing on this site, but the end product is freakin' sweet... and this is even sweeter...

Forrest Gump in one minute? Really? haha... nice...

This would look beautiful over the dining room table... although the lady of the house would never approve...

Urban camouflage... the Dimwit wants to do this...

Ok, there, new format but same linkage...

And to answer your question CorticoWhat... The Dimwit will include a photo of the H-O-T girlfriend as soon as she grants him express written consent... which will happen right about the same time he straps on ice skates and does a triple sow cow on Hell's Ice Rink... but he'll keep working on it... hahaha... have a good Tuesday every one.

Friday, March 6, 2009

TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF

And he doesn't mean anything about the restaurant! It's FRIDAY!!!! YAY!!!!

Ok, enough joy and happiness, it's oppressing when overdone.

So, anyone surprised with American Idol last night? The Dimwit saw it coming... but thank the Lord above that they did not send Tatiana "Crazy As Hell" Del Toro into the finals. The Dimwit wanted to shoot lasers at her until her face exploded. She'll get a reality show gig out of this, the Dimwit regretfully predicts. Some Hollywood schulb will think "I can get huge ratings by just following this crazy loon around with a camera." And what the hell was up with her changing accents?!?!?! That girl needs a lobotomy, if there is anything left up there. The Dimwit had told his girlfriend (yea, he has one, and she is H-O-T) that if Tatiana made the top 12/13 that he would stop watching AI for the rest of the season... she instantly became a Tatiana fan... whatever, she's made him start watching Jon & Kate Plus 8... way worse than AI...

Other than that, the Dimwit wasn't really surprised with any of the judges choices. He still thinks Danny Gokey is going to win it all. He's got the best voice, personality and most talent of the entire group. Unless he does something stupid along the lines of forgetting lyrics or singing some Celine Dion crap, he should coast to the title.

Wow, the Dimwit is embarassed to have committed that many words in a blog to American Idol. He can't help it, he's addicted.

Speaking of addictions... The Mighty Stef dropped their new album today... BUY IT! It is AWESOME! 100 Midnights! AWESOME... The Dimwit puts his reputation on this... if you don't like it, well you can lower your opinion of the Dimwit... so yea, if you don't like it then he'll be down there between "Pond Scum" and "Tatiana Del Toro"...

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Thursday... funny... so so so funny...

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All you animal lovers out there are going to hate the Dimwit for even posting this, however he is a FIRM believer that if you can't laugh at life, you shouldn't be living. Why so serious? :-D Have a great Thursday... hey, you've gotten 4 posts this week from the Dimwit, be grateful... for every angry email the Dimwit gets from the PETA loving whack jobs, he will kill you...

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Wednesday - Hump Day... The Dimwit Won't Go For The Obvious Joke Here...

Howdy... the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo got started last night. Rascal Flatts... the Dimwit was NOT in attendance, as he detests "modern" country, which is like metrosexual Hip-Hop with steel guitars. Blech. There aren't many artists he wishes to see this year, and of the three he'd like to see, two of them are on Monday nights and the Dimwit has his sand volleyball league on Monday nights, so that's a no go.

So, instead of the rodeo, the Dimwit settled in for another night of American Idol. Yes, he admits he's strangely addicted to this show. This year however, is a MAJOR disappointment. Last night was another long night of crappy performances by out of tune, wrong-song-selecting morons. The only redeeming performance was the last one, from Lil Rounds. Although the Dimwit rejects her entirely simply because her parents named her "Lil". Enough is enough people... Stop just picking words at random and deciding it makes a good name. Adjectives are not proper names. If this continues, the Dimwit will be forced to name his first child Stinky McFart Dimwit. This combines both the trend of using adjectives as names and slapping "Mc" infront of words to describe someone (thank you Grey's Anatomy for your contribution to pop culture, now stop).

The Dimwit's ability to find linkage at his place of employment has been dramatically reduced, thus the linkage has dropped off in quality and quantity. However, this should not keep you loyal readers away, as it means the Dimwit is going to have to come up with actual bloggage content...

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Tuesday - Feelin' Better... and Worse...

So the Dimwit has been a bit under the weather... but he is encouraged as he is feeling better today. He only worked a half-day yesterday, slept the rest. Stupid cold/allergies.

However, the Dimwit has nothing to complain about. Recently, he has gained a new member of the Dimwit Brigade, and the Dimwit formally recognizes this because, after reading his blog, the Dimwit gained a deep level of respect for a man he will, in all reality, probably never meet. Corticowhat, the Dimwit plans on following along with you for as long as you keep blogging. For my fellow readers, take some time and catch up on his blog. His bravery is inspiring, as is his brutal honesty about his condition and lengths he will go to for his family. Not a lot of people would have the cojones to face life the same way. Thank you sir.

On another note, the Dimwit went to a Flogging Molly concert this past Friday. While the Dimwit thoroughly enjoyed the Flogging Molly Celtic Punk ROCKAGE... the opening band has garnered a fair amount of praise... The Mighty Stef... check out this guy and his Dublin-based band. Great stuff...

The Dimwit doesn't have any linkage for you today. Regarding yesterday's video... wow, talk about seeing a real presentation on the effect our culture (world-wide) is having on this Earth. The Dimwit doesn't plan on being a father, so he won't be "saving the world for his children's children's children's etc. etc... but this does get his attention. Something needs to be done... we aren't just disposing of plastic food trays by throwing it in the trash... we're throwing away our oceans, rivers, streams, fish, animals and nature. Who wants to go kayaking or river-floating through old plastic bottles and bottle caps? What's the solution? No clue. Maybe there isn't one at this point.

The Dimwit signs off now... have a good day!

Monday, March 2, 2009

Monday - A TED Talk Worth Listening To...

A rather impressive speech. This is all you're getting today people. Think about it...